Hole in My Heart

Hole in My HeartIt’s been a month since Browny passed away, and I still can’t get over it. The hole in my heart is simply too big since he was my world and my life. He still is. And I miss him so much.

There’s not a day that I don’t think about him and I always find myself crying. The other day I went to the grocery store to get some stuff. I remembered Browny, and tears started to well in my eyes. It’s embarrassing because people might think I’m crazy – going through the grocery aisles crying.

But what can I do, I always think about my baby when I’m out because I want to return home quickly to find him waiting for me. And the thought of not having him there really breaks my heart to pieces.

The hardest thing I’m facing right now is going to bed at night. Well, aside from dreading to go to sleep, the end of the day seems to signify nothing. I always cry myself to sleep because I just miss his presence beside me so much. Sobbing is definitely not a good way to end my day every day.

And then I wake up to nothing. Browny used to be so excited to see me in the morning. He’d kiss me like we’re not sleeping on the same bed. Like he missed me so much while we were sleeping. It made me happy then, as we always welcomed the new day together.

Now I don’t feel like welcoming any new day. I know it’s just going to be another day without my Browny. Another sad and miserable day. So I guess there will always be a big hole in my heart…

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